Adoption

Not just a pen
A plastic tube
Infused with ink
For the single moment
When tip meets parchment
Ink expelled into fibres
Creating a lasting mark
A permanent vow
A signature
Neatly printed on a scrap of paper

Not just paper
Compressed pulp
With typed words
And signatures
Of grave importance
The responsibility of just one
A name

Not just a name
Letters combined
Into a symbol
For a person
An appellation
To indicate
A human masterpiece
One individual
In a core unit
A family

Not just a family
A home
Laughter and Tears
Shouts and Adoration
Consolation and Correction
Devotion and Love
Woven together
Through history
Through struggle
Through choices
Into an ever changing tapestry
Including each single piece

Not just a piece
A life
Connected to the others
With duct tape
And band-aids
Now pierced
By a needle
Creating a tiny hole
Through which
An unbreakable filament
Is yanked
And pulled
Tightly
Until the ragged edges
Abut those of the others
Overlapping
Puzzle pieces
Fill all the gaps
Left by scars
Hatred
Rejection
So many attempts
To glue this piece
To so many others
But the inevitable holes
Each time
Showed the light of day
But not this time

Each stitch
Expertly sewn
Smoothly creating
An almost unnoticeable seam
Different from the others
In its colour and thickness
But complementary in its design
A permanent home
For the little piece
To grow
And love
And believe

Not a single piece
A part of a whole
The work that was incomplete
Without that piece
Lacking
Unknowingly insufficient
Now beautiful
Strong
Able to add layers
Borders to the outside
Because inside
Cohesive Artwork
Created
By THE Creator


November 16, 2009

God's-Eye View

Of all the mysteries

Surrounding

Our creator

Our maker

The Lord of the Universe

The one mystery

That eludes me

Most often

Is the way

He seems to

Like

Me

Most days

I barely like

Myself

Tolerate

At best

My imperfections

Strides towards

Total self-destruction

My utter lack of will power

The inability to change

Anything

About myself

To paraphrase

St. Paul

What I want to do

I can’t manage to pull off

What I want to avoid

Seems to drag me into its path

Seems to surround me

All these failures

These terrible character traits

Seem to be enough

To push away

The friends and acquaintances

Who can’t stand loudmouths

Who judge my devotion to God

Who give me the once over

And cast me aside

Like a second from the factory

To be sold at a discount

To the lower classes

The friendless

Not the popular

Or the In crowd

It is no wonder

That my mirror

Is distorted

I see through their perceived

Eyes

No longer a true image

The flaws hide the beauty

No longer optimistic

Depressed thoughts

Drag me deeper

Into the abyss

Of self-criticism

How does the Maker

Feel about the disparagement

Of his masterpiece?

The quirks and imperfections

He so carefully chose

To compliment

The strengths

To build the character

Of his chosen child

His view is also distorted

He is colour blind

To the shades of

The outer shell

The masks

I wear

He sees only the

Heart

The inner beauty

The passions

Emotions

Intentions

Those I love

The traits I wish

I could show the world

I don’t need to hide

From Him

There would be

No point

He’d find me

I’m on His radar

He knows me best

Yet He still

Likes me

In spite of

Because of

The chinks

In my armour

That allow Him

To get inside

To move inside

My soft heart

My desire?

To see

Me

Through His eyes

To know me

Better

As He knows me

To one day

Like myself

The way God

Likes me

June 30, 2009

My Apology

It's inevitable

My mouth

The trouble-maker

Getting me into

Sticky situations

Hurting those closest to me

Those I care for

Those who used to care for me

Before

The iron grip

I wish to have

On my tongue

Can never be strong enough

Can never hold the reigns

Turn the steed in the right direction

Away from danger

Ruin

Despair

Apologies

Never enough

Absolutely

The lamest

Most ridiculous

Excuses

There ARE no excuses

My mistakes

My words

Once set free

To roam the air

Seeking ears

Seeking minds

To contaminate

Always the same

A careless comment

Made in humour

Begins the slippery descent

The laughter becomes forced

Awkward

Regret

Never enough words to explain

Never enough time to retrace the steps

To reel it all back in

Take it all back

I know

The pain in my heart

The empty thud

In the pit of my stomach

Must

Be worse than the offense

You feel

Berating my stupidity

Utter lack of self-control

Complete human-ness

Repeated transgressions

The path walked so many times

Now familiar

Rutted by my heavy feet

I wish I could cry

I wish I could use my tears

Salted water

Wash away my shame

My guilt

Clean the slate

But all I have is another word

Completely inadequate

Yet somehow

Poetic justice

That a word is what I cling to

My life preserver

My last hope

Of forgiveness

Rests in a word

Yet to be spoken

Sorry

(June 29, 2009)